How I Manage Loneliness Working From Home

A popular question I get asked a lot: how do I manage loneliness working from home?

I’ve been working from home for over 3 years now (holy crap, where has the time gone?), and whilst I consider myself extremely lucky that I have that kinda freedom, working from home isn’t all sunshine and rainbows that people might think it can be.

Sure, we don’t ‘have to’ set our alarm clocks or sit in rush hour traffic every morning, but that doesn’t mean that every single day is a party in your PJ’s. Yes, you can bet ya bottom dollar that we sometimes work in our PJ’s until midday.

I’ve heard of ‘freelancer loneliness’ before, but it wasn’t until the start of 2019 when I started to experience the ‘day after day’ experience. All of a sudden, I found my days blurring into one. I wasn’t experiencing proper human interaction (y’kno, the kinda office banter you usually have day to day). My concentration levels were dipping, which meant that my anxiety levels were increasing. My house was silent. I craved someone to talk to (sorry Mr Postman). And lastly, I slipped into the habit of ‘not switching off’ and working more hours than I should.

Don’t get me wrong, it’s not unusual for these patterns to occur when you work from home – the same goes for remote workers too. The thing is, you need to know when to snap out of this ‘freelancer loneliness’ syndrome and when to get back on top of things. Which is exactly what I did a month or two ago.

I always believe that we should try to achieve some kind of balance in life. Not only does a balanced lifestyle manage to keep us sane, but it also helps to keep our mental health in tip-top condition too. Have you ever noticed how you perform your very best when your mind is alert, in-tact and feeling positive? Yup, me too.

So, as I said, I took matters into my own hands and managed to get back on track. Aka, no more feeling sorry for myself. Here are a few things I currently do to help myself from feeling lonely and unmotivated when working from home…

Podcasts + YouTube videos

My mum always leaves the radio on for the dog when she goes out and about ‘it stops him feeling lonely’, so I figured, if it works for the dog, then it’ll work for me, right? Nope. It didn’t. I don’t know whether it was the constant music or the depressing Brexit reminders, but I found that it slowly made me worse.

So, I experimented a little and asked my Twitter followers for some podcast recommendations. Sure enough, I was on my way listening to Fearne Cotton’s podcast and other various one’s I came across. And guess what? It helped. In fact, it kind of mimicked the ‘office conversation’ I was once known to – as if I was actually listening in on a conversation between my collegues. Sad I know, but hey, it worked!

The same goes for YouTube videos. Obviously, these are more ‘sit down and chat’ YouTube videos (big fan of Lydia Millen) otherwise you’ll end up watching the video and not working instead.

Failing that, if you have a little self-control, then you could always get another monitor and have your YouTube video on one screen and your work on the other? Just make sure it’s not a distraction and waste away your days catching up with your favourite vlogger – as tempting as it may be.

Spend 1-2 days working away from home

One of my New Year resolutions for 2019 was to work away from home at least once a week. I’ll admit that I haven’t managed it every week (those are the weeks that I found myself suffering a lot from loneliness), but once I got into the habit of packing my bag and heading to my local cafe or The Solent Hotel Spa to work, I found that it helped massively. Not only did I have constant chatter surrounding me, but my productivity increased massively as well. Bingo.

I currently only work away from home 1-2 days a week because I’m a massive frugal at heart, but if you’re ok with spending silly amounts on cups of coffee’s (and food), then go for it – work away from home as much as you can. Another bonus of camping in a cafe for the majority of the day is that it stops you from procrastinating. I’m talking about those pointless trips to the fridge for no reason at all other than to stare at its contents.

Lunchtime walk

Unless I’m stupidly busy, I will always try to squeeze in a lunchtime walk with the pooch. A simple walk around midday will help to break up your day, increase your concentration levels and hopefully, leave you feeling a little more positive from a bit of fresh air. Aka, clear that brain fog!

I also find myself falling into the habit of working 9 hours straight (with a 10-minute eat-at-my-desk break.) Therefore, a quick lunchtime walk allows me to have that much-needed break.

Phone calls

Whether you hate it or not, I strongly encourage you to pick up the phone and actually listen to someone’s voice.

We spend far too long writing out emails, talking over WhatsApp and direct messaging each other and again, we’re still not interacting with each other properly. I always aim to call someone once or twice a day for a quick chat to avoid feeling a little lonely.

Sunlight

Did you know that a moderate amount of sunlight each day can help improve your mood and increase your focus by boosting the serotonin levels in your body? Serotonin is also known as the ‘happiness hormone’ thanks to it’s effects of making you feel calm and alert.

My advice? Get outside at least once a day, even if it’s for 10 minutes. Or better yet, work outside if you can!

Evening hobbies

If I had to pick one thing that I dislike about working from home then it’s the fact that I don’t give myself a ‘go home’ time. Basically, because I don’t technically have a 9-5pm job (I prefer an earlier start), I don’t give myself permission to finish for the day. Instead, I often find myself working until 7 pm. Pretty long for a 7.30am start, huh?

Because of this, I now schedule something into my evenings which means that I have to leave the office at a reasonable time. For me, that’s going to the gym at 7/8pm. Super important for avoiding freelancer loneliness.

Avoid working in your PJ’s

Although it sounds bloody marvellous (who wouldn’t love wearing their PJ’s during the day?) the novelty soon wears off and – maybe it’s just me – but it can actually leave you feeling like you haven’t got your shit together.

Now, you may agree or disagree with me here, but I often find that the days I don’t put some effort into my appearance, are the days I struggle a little with motivation and feel the effects of freelancer loneliness.

Nowadays, I make the effort to do my make-up, brush my hair (believe me, you can get really lazy working from home) and make myself look presentable for the day.

Be consistent with a to-do list

Oh, how I wish I had done this sooner! If I had to rank these tips in order, this would be my second favourite (working away from my top).

I’ve always been a bit of a sucker for a to-do list but I’ve never really been consistent with them. I’d create one for a day or two and then I’d get lost in my work again. However, a month or so ago I decided to buy myself a pretty fancy ‘list a day’ and stick with it. The results? So far, so good. I’ve certainly noticed that it helps to keep me busy, on track and motivated. All in all, I don’t find myself getting as lonely because I’m super busy with a never ending to do list!

Each day I write out my list and tick them off as I go. I’m pretty lucky that I have a full schedule each day but if this isn’t you, then find yourself the work. Stop procrastinating. Stop googling random things. Give yourself a kick up the ass.

At the end of the day, we’re incredibly lucky to work from home and I am so grateful that I get to do what I do – really I am! However, it can come with its downfalls – freelancer loneliness being one of them. However, it’s up to you to deal with it.

My advice? Notice that you’re struggling and take action. Trial and error the points above, see what work for you and give it time. Loneliness sucks, it really does but trust me, there are always ways to keep your mind busy (often our worst enemy at times).

Do you find yourself often suffering with loneliness working from home? I’d love to hear some of your tips below!

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