How I Stopped Obsessing Over Fitness & Food

Two years ago, I decided to quit CrossFit after a year of obsessing over fitness, training for 2 hours a day and sticking to a strict diet regime. My behaviour was obsessive, I was becoming competitive in all of my classes and I started to experience symptoms of a hormonal imbalance. Of course, at the time I was completely unaware of my behaviour and deeply in love with my passion and motivation for CrossFit, but after a year and a half of overtraining, I started to realise my relationship with fitness (and food) had gone too far.

Fast forward to today, a year after I decided to make some BIG decisions to cut back and take control of my health, I’m now much healthier, working out less than I used to (and not feeling guilty for it), less focused on the foods I eat & most importantly, no longer obsessing over fitness and food.

So what happened? What did I do? Well, quite a few things actually, but here are the biggest things I did to help break my obsession with fitness and food…

1. Detach yourself from the unhealthy habit

This was by far the hardest part of my decision to work on my unhealthy relationship with fitness. I knew I had to take a break from the current thing I was obsessing about at the time (CrossFit) and that’s exactly what I did. It was probably one of the hardest things I’ve done as I had such a big passion for CrossFit, but in 2019 I knew I had to do the right thing for both my body and mind and cut things loose.

Now I’m not saying you have to give it up completely in order to detach yourself from an unhealthy habit, but rather work on yourself until you know you can return to it later on with a completely different mindset. Personally, I decided to stop focusing on the numbers (how much weight I could lift etc) and instead, I focused on doing all the things that made me feel good – mentally and physically. This meant saying goodbye to heavyweights and intense training and trying new forms of exercise instead such as yoga, pilates, swimming and running.

I’m yet to go back to CrossFit but I think if I ever did, I’d 100% go back with a new mindset and that’s only because I took the time out to work on myself and my faults.

2. Eat to train, don’t train to eat

Sadly, I think I developed the mindset of working out more and eating fewer foods because of social media, especially as my Instagram account was created during the hype of Kayla Itsines Bikini Body Guides and low calorie diets. But let me say this: you deserve to eat whether you train or not.

Somewhere along the way, the media have created this stupid idea that in order to enjoy the simple pleasures of a chocolate bar or pizza, you have to push your body through a really intense workout in order to “earn” the calories. I can’t tell you how angry this type of messaging makes me feel. Not just because this type of mindset gives us less control, but because it dictates how intense our workouts become, or if we even go to the gym that day or not. I mean, god forbid eating a cookie if you haven’t worked out that day?!

Once I learnt the simple science behind the importance of fuelling my body before a workout (especially us ladies) and stopped labelling certain foods with “treats” and “cheat meals”, I slowly started to see a positive change in the way I was eating. Now, I can happily eat whatever I want and not have a single ounce of guilt, no matter if I’ve trained that day or not.

My advice? Start small and take baby steps. If you obsess over counting calories, then start by taking one day off calorie counting and progress from there.

3. Find a new community online

Now when I say community, I mean new accounts to follow on your social media platforms. When I gave up CrossFit, I had to unfollow a few accounts on my Instagram so I didn’t experience any FOMO. Finding and following accounts that inspire, motivate and most importantly, make you happy online is so incredibly important, if not just for your mental health.

Also, following people who follow a lifestyle that you wish to adapt to can help you on your journey to stop obsessing over fitness too. For me, that was following more accounts that focused on yoga, pilates & a whole lot of self-care too. It allowed me to learn a new way of living (and exercising), rather than focusing on a pretty intense training schedule that was go-go-go 24/7.

4. Give yourself permission to enjoy the foods you love

Firsly, let me remind you that food is food. The person who ate the bowl of fruit is no better than the person who ate the chocolate bar as a snack. There simply is no such thing as GOOD food nor BAD food.

In all honestly, I think my relationship with food improved once I stopped overtraining and under-fuelling my body. You see, once you already have an unhealthy habit, it’s really easy to create a new unhealthy habit that combines with the first. It’s almost like a compound of unhealthy habits form together.

Once I addressed my obsession with fitness, only then was I able to take control of my relationship with food. When I first began my fitness journey, I fell into the trap of grouping certain foods like chocolate, ice cream and pizza together and calling them “treats” or only foods I could enjoy as a “cheat meal”. By becoming aware of the foods you label ‘good’ and ‘bad’, you can start to ask yourself why you’re labelling those foods in the first place. Do you think you’re cheating if you eat those certain foods? Do you fear those foods because of the way they have been portrayed in the media? Ask yourself these questions to dig deeper and then work on that issue.

Instead of seeing certain foods and good or bad, start seeing them as nourishing food. Because yes, all food is nourishing. Whether it nourishes you to feel energised, or whether it nourishes you to feel good, all food has the ability to pleasure you. Once you become aware of which foods nourish you and why it’s then down to the balancing act of how much you consume those foods (hint: there is no right or wrong here – only you will know this).

5. Take more time to understand your body

My personal story meant I had no choice but to step back and understand the way exercise can affect our bodies, especially our hormones. At the start of the year, and after months of researching, I made the decision to start syncing my exercise to my menstrual cycle to help support my body, rather than fighting it. Sadly, after those years of overtraining and under fuelling, I put my body into a position where it was no longer performing at its best and I started seeing signs of a hormonal imbalance.

You see, unlike men who perform on a 24-hour cycle, women actually operate on an average 28-day cycle, with energy peaking & dipping around certain times in the month. Syncing your exercise to your menstrual cycle not only helps you to perform better, but it has profound benefits on your overall health too, including hormone balance.

I’m not saying everyone needs to take this approach, but taking the time to understand your body and how it performs, especially us women, can really help you re-focus on the importance of your health, rather than obsessing about your fitness levels.

Once I started realising the importance of ovulating, having healthy periods, getting optimal sleep and recovering well (all of which I wasn’t when I was obsessing about my fitness), was I then able to take a different approach to fitness.

The wonderful thing about our bodies is that we are all different, so taking the time to understand yours is one of the most important things you can do.

6. Accept that everybody’s diet looks different

Just like a petrol car runs on petrol, a diesel car runs on diesel. Both cars run the same, but both cars require a different type of fuel. The same goes for you. You can’t expect your diet to look the same as your fellow gym buddy or IG influencer just because you work out the same, can you?

A big part of my journey was taking control of how I always compared my diet to others. I can’t even begin to tell you how many days I obsessed over influencers “What I eat in a day” videos which led to me to re-evaluate my own diet every single time. But I wonder how many of us truly understand how unhealthy it is to try and match someone else’s daily food consumption (calorie for calories and macro for macro), just because we think if we eat like them then we might end up looking like them too. When in fact, those videos alone (which now flood social media) show exactly how much we’re obsessed with what other people eat… and this was exactly me 1/2 years ago.

Sure, while these videos might seem harmless and only a bit of fun (heck, I’ve been guilty of doing them myself when I was obsessing over my food), they’re actually an indication of our society’s problematic desire to imitate our favourite online influencers in order to look ‘better’. But he’s the thing: the videos themselves, and the messaging that comes with them are dangerous. They re-frame the mind of the viewer that whatever those “what I eat in a day” videos show, you too should consume the same.

But what many of us seem to have forgotten somewhere along the way, is that while some women may actually thrive on 1,800 calories per day (while still getting their period which is a sign of optimal female health), some women may not. Knowing what your body needs is something that generally requires research, along with advice from professionals.

The truth of the matter is this: imitating someone else’s diet is not going to get you the results you want or need. Listen to your body, know how it performs it best, unfollow or mute those who post “what I eat in a day” videos and instead, fuel your body to feel its absolute best.

7. Find the Ying and Yang of fitness

As humans, we need a significant amount of balance in order to thrive, especially when it comes to our work/life balance. So why don’t we treat fitness the same way? For the first time in my life, I’ve been approaching fitness in a completely different way where I focus on a contrast of different exercises that compliment each other, otherwise known as the Ying and Yang.

This past year alone I’ve been mixing things up with pilates and yoga to help re-balance my body whilst still working towards my strength and conditioning goals and along the way, it’s not only allowed me to re-adjust my mindset when it comes to fitness but it’s also opened up a whole new world of trying new exercises, especially ones that are kinder to my body.

While it’s important to move more, do the things you love & keep your body active both mentally & physically, it’s just as important, if not more, to slow things down and understand the yin & yang of fitness. Go for the high-intensity workouts if that’s your thing, but also learn to go a little slower when your body needs it. Fitness isn’t about how much weight you can lift, how many miles you can run without stopping or how many days you can work out in a week, it’s about improving your quality of life.

8. Break up with your fitness tracker

Fitness trackers are great for a lot of things, especially when it comes to motivating you to workout. But what about when you have an obsession with fitness? I personally found that at times I was obsessing too much on the number of calories I burnt or how many minutes I had worked out for – and god forbid if I had a day where I hit under 10K steps (wow am I glad to no longer think like that)!

When it got to the point where my fitness watch was mostly a distraction that lessened my enjoyment of working out, I knew something had to go. It’s not you, it’s me. Or was it? My watch only loved me when I hit over 10K steps a day, reached my 400 calorie movement goal and worked out 5 days in a row, so who was to blame?

At more times than most, I slowly found myself doing the extra steps or burning the extra calories just to please the expensive gadget on my wrist rather than myself. So when I found myself constantly monitoring my steps and data, I decided to take a break from it.

Instead of taking it off completely (because I do actually love my Apple watch), I decided to stop using the workout feature instead and ignore any nudges to workout or move that day (even if I already did). And soon enough, I found myself focusing less on the data and more on the enjoyment exercise brings me.

It also helped massively when I started switching my exercises to less intense workouts too, like pilates and yoga. Otherwise, knowing my obsessive mindset, I would have focused on the fact that those workouts didn’t burn enough calories as my usual HIIT or strength workouts did!

I slowly started using the workout feature on my Apple watch again at the start of the year and thankfully, I’m in a much better place with it. I no longer obsess over the calories or feel bad on a day when I haven’t moved much, let alone reached a 10K step goal.

So are you ready to start a new journey that helps you focus less on fitness and food as a whole and instead start focusing on your overall health and wellbeing? Remember, progress takes time and it certainly took me a lot of time to adjust my mindset to a healthier one. There is no one size fits all when it comes to fitness. Do whatever makes you happy. Take care of your body. Prioritise your health. Eat the foods you enjoy. Practice the Ying and Yang of fitness. Love yourself a little more each day. And know that you CAN have a lifestyle where fitness isn’t your only priority in life.

Hannah x

PS, you can shop my outfits at Adidas [ad/pr product]

Photography: Cydnee Brook